Giving an explanation is NOT NECESSARY.
You do not have to tell anybody anything. If you’re unable to do something, what’s the problem with just plain “No.” ????
We all have to rush to the conclusion that we need to give a reason. No reason needed. No fucks given.
Maybe you feel it’s courteous, but just don’t. If somebody asks you specifically why you’re saying no, or why you cannot participate or why you’re behaving in a specific manner, and you actually WANT to tell them, that’s a different story. That’s also NEVER the story. It’s always like – I can’t do something and I don’t exactly wish to discuss why but people are always asking me why and/or I feel like I need to discuss why (even if the person I’m talking to does not give a fuck). If you want to spill, that’s your own business and go right ahead and over-share your personal life. Go right ahead. Excuse me while I don’t listen and have to think of some stupid thing to say back to you as I continue to pretend to care and/or not have a clue what you’re talking about because you’re probably making something up. #bogus
You owe the world no details of your personal life. So shhhhhh!!! Don’t feel obligated to share. It is 100% satisfactory & A-OK to say “No” and that’s the end of the conversation.
Person Asking Question: Can you do me a favor and pick me up/stay at work 3 hours later than anticipated/stop being a betch/be my valentine tomorrow?
Wrong Answer Example #1: No, I can’t because I have to pick my dog up from the groomer at 5PM, I have tentative dinner plans with this guy I met on Tinder at 7PM & I’m likely going to spend the night by myself watching GIRLS & drinking a bottle of wine.
Wrong Answer Example #2: I’m sooooooooo sorry. Can’t! I have a paper due tomorrow and I haven’t started it yet – it’s on the Cold War and I don’t even know how people could be cold in a war that was fought in the warmth. Wait… maybe it was in the cold? Was it in the north? I’m so confused —better start reading but sorry! Hope you find someone or something!
Person A: (Ummmmm….? WTF.)
Wrong Answer Example #3: Yes, I would fucking LOVE to.
Correct Answer: No.
Simple. It’s over. No explanation needed. If they beg, that’s funny. Let them beg. And you already win. So forget the guilt and go with a good old, clear & concise “No.”
“No need to shout, betch!”