How To: Survive WITHOUT Your iPhone: Day 1

Step 1: Wake Up Slow… because your iPhone broke overnight, your alarm will not go off and you’re going to just have to figure it out when you wake up. You had weird dreams too and you can’t even text your best friends about them because no phone. Hopefully you use iCloud or backed up your phone recently…. yeah. I really F-ing hope I did. UGHHHH.

Step 2: Log in to your email. Check email. Email people that will be trying to reach you throughout the day that your phone is done for and to email you instead. Reschedule all phone calls you may have so you can call the person instead of them calling you.

Step 3: Make an appointment at the Apple Store….. for 3 days from now. HOW EFFICIENT, APPLE!!!!?!!?!?! Thanks for nothing.

Step 4: Contemplate doing whatever else you’re supposed to do today without having the following benefits of an iPhone or a cell phone in general.

– GPS / Google Maps / Waze – basically, research where you’re traveling to ahead of time on your laptop (if you have one), write it down? or print it out? (if you have a printer) OR follow street signs like an archaic animal that you now are. Sorry civilization leaves your body completely when you are without beloved iPhone.

– Instagram: I mean – this hurts. But don’t you dare tell me that it’s important enough to log on to your Instagram through your laptop just to check out what your psycho friends and the celebs you stalk are doing. It’s not that good… and if it is that good, your friends will text you in group chat about it…. OH WAIT… (like I said, you’re F’d).

Step 5: Cry and scream when you realize that you’ve LOST everything on your iPhone that’s important to you since the last time your stupid iPhone display broke (less than 1 month ago). Cry more. But don’t really cry just have a mean RBF that will not leave your body. FOREVER.

Step 6: Wait until tomorrow…

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